A REWARD: IS NECESSARY FOR BEING HUMAN?

I noticed that grass grow wildly in my yard so I asked someone to clear it and he asked for some payment of it so we agreed of the payment and he did it. Looking at this small incident brought me an awareness that people need a reward of their work or service in terms of gift, money, or any other token of appreciation. But why?

When I was a child, I remember my parents asked me to do certain household and at the end they appreciated what I did with a “short of gift”; my school recognized my best performance by giving me “a certificate of appreciation”; when I attended a course, the institution presented me with a certificate of attendance; and when I performed the best in my work, I was granted a promotion. Why?

A reward is given in order to recognize one’s performance and one’s work or service but it unconsciously raises a mentality of expecting reward and of striving for reward. Reward becomes a sign of success. However, it is a good thing to expect and to strive for the best in our life but it is a barrier of personal growth when we expect and strive for reward. “I am not looking for money but money will come when I do my work well and I serve my costumers well”.

I remember a theory in sociology and psychology, called social exchange theory, which see human relationship and interaction in terms of implementing a cost-benefit analysis to determine risks benefits. This theory can be seen clearly in romantic relationship, friendship, professional relationship and very short relationship. Problems caused by social exchange are occurred when the costs of relationship are higher than rewards received.

Thus, rewards, can be seen clearly in human interaction when one has a value to offer and see that his/her value is beneficial for others. Parents reward their children because they see that their children perform well as a child in the family and make them happy. At the same time children reward their parents by showing them values, to which their parents highly appreciate. The only problem is that when one’s expectation of rewards is not valued. It leads to one’s frustrations.

So a reward is important but it should be followed by good motivation; reward cannot determine someone destiny of happiness and of being fully human. Reward actually is an instrument to reach our goal but we cannot make it as a goal or the only goal in our life. Reward can never be the way of measuring our interaction and relationship with others. What I think, do or act for having a value for myself, should not be focused to get reward. I behave and act well because by doing so I fulfill myself to be human; I enrich myself to be more human; and I empower myself to fulfill my humanity. Furthermore, when I fulfill my humanity I praised and glorify the Creator, my God, who created me and put me here and now for His Purpose and for His Glory.

Striving for and getting what we expect and dream of is a way of live our life but our dream should not be for a reward. “I am living my life to pursue my dream and my goal” is not for the reward but reward will be a result of it.

We are naturally built in for a reward; it can be physical, emotional, or spiritual to actualize our needs. Abraham Maslow, a psychologist, with his hierarchy of human needs, describes the process of actualization of oneself from the basic to the higher needs. When we apply it to the reward; reward, therefore, can be seen as a motivation of someone to fulfill his/her needs in their life. Reward can be a motivation for us to live. For example, when I perceive of having a degree and then getting a better job as rewards, I will study harder for it and will get it as a reward because by getting a degree and getting a better paid job I will satisfy my need of security and other basic needs or even reaching my self-actualization.

Thus, we are molded, formed, and fashioned by parents and our society to get reward but we should understand of its motivation: does my motivation to get a reward is morally, culturally and socially acceptable? Does my motivation pave a way to reach my self-actualization or in Jesus term, to have life to its fullness? Good and true motivation is like good soil for seed that provide nutrients for a seed to grow, which at the end it will produce good harvest and better fruit in life. Do we seek for reward, which is benefits for the good of our community or only to benefit our ego? Do we strive for reward to satisfy our soul or only to quench our thirst of power and self-glory?